Being Big
January 29, 2024
When you see the same theme repeatedly within 24 hours, you take pause and consider sharing.
I saw someone online recently make public apology videos. She apologized for being too much. For having big dreams. For not staying in her place, in her lane. For not being a silent, beautiful jewel. For not being quiet. For being selfish and sinful for having dreams.
It was heartbreaking to watch. Because I have been there. I worked so hard to stay small for so long. To push myself and my dreams down. To be and do what I thought other people expected me to.
It is suffocating. It is damaging.
And then, I had a conversation with friends this weekend about the importance of size and shape.
About how many of us learned young that some things are possible and other things are not based on who we are and how we were raised. We learned to play small.
About how many of us learned young that we have to be one thing based on what is expected of us. Follow a pre-determined plan.
About how we are learning we can give ourselves permission to show up big. And we don’t have to be just one thing. We are complex and changing. We are learning how that can be beautiful and confusing to us and those we love. We are leaning that we can take risks, try new things, embrace new beginnings.
About how playing small and following a plan feels safe and known.
About how showing up big and taking risks feels scary and unknown. It goes against cultural expectations.
And in the middle of this conversation, another friend from 971 miles away sent me these words:
“…I don't want to squeeze myself into small spaces that aren't meant for me.
I don't want to "tone down" my personality so I'll be liked...”
~ Jess Johnston
Here’s to allowing ourselves to be big, dream big, and transform along the way!
P.S. The quote at the bottom of the board was written by one of my teens. It makes me smile every time I see it. And so it will not be erased for a while.
P.P.S. Jess Johnston wrote more in this piece, but I’m saving the other part for another post.